A Moment In Time
by Mel966
Summary: Edward asks Bella to tell him what it was like for her when he left. Set between New Moon and Eclipse. BXE. Some NM spoilers. Oneshot.


_A one-shot of some simple Edward and Bella fluff. Set sometime between New Moon and Eclipse. Some spoilers for New Moon. Thanks for reading, and reviews are wonderful._

My own personaly Adonis wrapped his stony cold arms around my waist, drawing me closer to him and inhaling deeply. I sighed and relaxed in his cool embrace. At one point, such a position would have caused me to tense up; I would have at one point worried that my blood might have been too much of a temptation. But since he came returned, it was as if my blood no longer sang to him. He claimed that it was because he loved me too much to even consider inflicting that kind of pain again. I think that perhaps it wasn't as romantic of a reason as that--that maybe it was just as simple as his desenzitation to my smell.

"What are you thinking, love?" his soft, soothing voice murmured into my ear. The chilliness of his breath and the proximity of his lips to my neck made me shiver.

"Nothing," I told him quietly, and it wasn't a lie. I had lost all train of thought when he had leaned in close to me. Every moment I spent with him I realized more and more how fortunate I was to have him and how much my hallucinations of him did him no justice.

He pulled away from me slightly, and I moved myself closer again, desperately. I was a little embarassed to admit how needy I had become since his return. I had never been so... frantic about his absences before he had... left. Maybe it was another side effect of my nigthmarish seven months without him.

"Bella," he said quietly, sounding hesitant. I stiffened in his arms. Was he having doubts? "Relax, love," he added, feeling my tensed frame. "What... what was it like for you? When I... left?" His voice was pained, and when I looked up at his face in shock, I noticed his previously golden eyes had darkened conspicuously.

I shifted on his lap uncomfortably. We had never talked about the time when he left. It was a subtly forbidden topic for us. Nervously playing with the hem of my shirt, I looked down at the couch we were seated on, unsure of how to respond. His cold breath raised goosebumps along my spine when he sighed impatiently. "Bella, I... want to know what I did. I've seen images in everyone's heads." His musical, beautiful voice was full of self-contempt. "But you have never told me what it was like to you. I want--I need to know, love. What were you thinking?"

I was suddenly blinking back tears as I delved into the memories. "In the forest," I began, my voice trembling and my eyes still trailed down, "after you left... I was in shock, I guess. Not that I didn't believe what you said..." I stopped as Edward inhaled sharply and tightened his grip on me, pressing his lips softly to my throat. It took me several seconds to gather my thoughts again. "Not that I didn't believe you, but that I thought it was a nightmare. I thought I would wake up and everything would be okay. I think that I was under that delusion for... the first few days."

I hastily reached up to wipe away a few stray tears, but he beat me to it, bending his head down to gently kiss away the tears that were sliding down my face. I trembled slightly as I met his dark tortured gaze. "I started to live again," I said quietly, dropping my gaze from his, "when I realized how much I was hurting the people around me. But every night..." My voice broke and I cleared my throat before continuing even quieter than before. "Every night, I had the same nightmare. Of... of you leaving in the clearing. I still have it sometimes." Edward was deadly silent, and it made me feel guilter than anything he could have said. "I'm sorry," I said timidly, wanting him to stop hurting.

He exhaled slowly. "You have absolutely nothing to be sorry for," he told me in a strained tone. I flinched at the hardness of his voice. "It's not your fault," he continued, gently, that time.

I knew he was blaming himself again, but I kept quiet about that. "I figured out when I was doing something stupid, I... could hear your voice. You were always telling me not to do the things. But that made me do them more... because when I heard your voice looking out for me... it made me feel like you still cared, that you still loved me," I whispered brokenly, trapped in the past. "I started hanging out with Jake more. He always hated you. I didn't know why until later. He helped me a lot... it was like he was my sun. When he was around, I didn't hurt so bad. But then he started ignoring me and acting strange. Eventually, I realized the truth--that he was a werewolf. The day you called, pretending to be Carlisle, he was at my house..." I let my voice trail off, not sure if I was going to omit the almost-kiss between Jacob and I.

"Don't hide anything," Edward told me softly, kissing the spot below my ear. "I want to know. If I didn't, I wouldn't have asked." His words soothed me, and I slowly began speaking again, in the same soft voice.

"He... was going to kiss me, right when the phone rang." I saw Edward's eyes widen and then darken. I took in a deep, shuddering breath before I resumed talking. "And then Alice told me what was going on. The next thing I know, I was on a plane to Italy. And you know the rest," I finished lamely.

He was silent, and I began to grow nervous, my palms sweating. "Edward?" I asked hesitantly, turning my head to face him.

His expression was tortured, dark. "And you... why did you take me back, after all I put you through?" He sounded confused and his arms loosened slightly around me. "Bella, you didn't need to. I thought I made that clear... you don't owe me anything."

I was beginning to panic, my heart thumping quickly, unhealthily. "You aren't... you can't leave again," I whispered mangledly, breathing heavily.

"No," he said firmly. "I'm not leaving, Bella, love. I'm just trying to tell you that you can leave any time. I won't stop you."

"I'm not leaving, either," I told him resolutely. "Ever. And I took you back because I love you." I smiled slightly to myself at the truth of my words.

He leaned foreward so his forehead was pressed against mine. "I love you more, my Bella," he whispered quietly.

I started to argue, but his mouth was on mine before I could frame the words. My heart pounding unsteadily in my chest, I kissed him back steadily, cherishing the coldness of his mouth on mine and the closeness of him. For once, he didn't pull away right away, and kissed me a little harder than normal as well. If that was merely a reaction to the guilt he was feeling, I couldn't tell. But I welcomed it happily, completely forgetting about what I was going to say before.

Finally, he pulled away, pausing to kiss my forehead lightly before pulling me against his chest. "Forever," he promised, resting his chin on the top of my head and placing one of his hands at the back of my head, stroking my hair gently.

I kissed his chest gently, feeling whole again and wishing I could live forever in that simple one moment in time.

_And there you go. It would have made my English teacher proud. Thanks for reading, and please review. Have a good day._

_Mel._


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